All my single ladies! yes, you the ones that are not in a primary pair bond, who do NOT find themselves hugging someone close to them at night before they bed, who do NOT wake up to a lover looking at them, begging them for morning sex…who do not get the intimacy they need because they’ve decided or not decided that they are better off alone, happen to be single or escaping a horrific partner…do YOU KNOW what I mean when I say that sometimes we “get paid to get ours?”
This is more true than EVER when you are not overloaded with the sex of a primary cohabitating relationship like the kinds that I have found myself in in the last 3 years. I’ve lived with two different guys for 2.5 years total. I made a point to make the sex in sex work quick and utilitarian. I had no motive to orgasm, except when I was hired by couples or I was pleasantly suprised. I was getting taken care of at home, and because of the nature of the relationships that I was in, it was almost a requirement to save most of your enjoyment and enthusiasm for the guy that waited for you outside of your show to drive you home and fuck you to prove that his shit was better than any trick he drove you to see.
It’s been a little over 3 months since I broke up with my last codependent abusive guy whom, I admittedly had fallen in quick love with for 3 months. This is what strung the noose of his abuse and made it so easy to overtake some of my will over the insane course of events and lies that he spewed in such a short period of time. I am a hopeless sucker for romance and attentive compassion. Him being an experienced textbook abuser had all of those tools in his belt but it’s false promises didn’t hold me for longer than 3 months. I have very low tolerance for being called out of my name repeatedly and treated like trash and contrary to popular belief it wasn’t THAT part of the relationship which kept me, it was the promises of love and romance which my heart still believes in despite all his abuse.
REVERSE ESCORTING: Since becoming a single lady again, I have to find a way to fulfil my need for orgasms, sexual pleasure AND intimacy without a partner to get these things from. Sex work is not the only outlet that I have but, when you are as busy as i am and work for a demanding agency, it is not only convenient but sensible to make the most out of the dates that you have to go on.
I barter for perks. I have always tried to enjoy my job. As much as possible. If they have a nice soft bed that is seemingly made of clouds, then I might be encouraged to spend more time there. If there is a hot tub with a whirlpool, a steamroom for my asthma, room service dinner with wine, a Laker game, a sunset island cruise, a waterfall over a sparkling swimming pool that we can sunbathe and swim in naked…and you can make me cum? wow. then i am yours! how exciting for me that I am getting paid for all of this as well! fuck yea! i love my job! i’m exclaiming on the inside as I roll around in the 600 thread count sheets and down duvet on the canopy bed overlooking the ocean…
It’s been over 3 months since I’ve had a lover sleep in my bed and roll around all day with me. It was a gray and fiercely rainy day in Los Angeles. Client and I were coming down from partying the night before. (him more than me…i had gotten some sleep) I proposed that he come over to my house and spend the day with me for free. Strangely, at first he turned the offer down, even making a dramatic “Just drop me off” charade before jumping back in my car. He was offended that I charged him for ONE HOUR and gave him 23 for free? Puhlease boy, get back in the car, I said, and easy enough as it was to get him to go to the ATM to get my donation was it easy enough to kidnap him back to my place to fulfil my need to be cuddled in my come down with affection and sex while the gray hours of Sunday passed from outside my bedroom window. I wasn’t going to beg. I was preparing myself to allow him to be dropped off. He was STILL a client in my eyes, although an adored one that i had created a special bond with, since he had helped me get my car engine fixed last month. I was careful not to let this client slip too quickly into freebie land. My rate steadily goes down every time we see each other and I know that it will be over soon unless I am willing to convert to real dating status, which because of our differences is probably not really possible. As your escort, I stay neutral and try to remain likeable, as your real girlfriend I make you put up with who I am for who I am and I am unwilling to make changes to lots of things for any partner’s needs, demands or insecurities. “if you want me to turn my phone off and just be with you, then you HAVE to donate, babe.” I said.”I don’t have the luxury to lay in bed all day and not work..” If he had left me then, I still would have laid in bed all day but instead be lonely and probably not have enough energy to go out on calls.
I needed him as much as he needed me. We fulfilled a purpose of intimacy for each other and it was wonderful. It was exactly what I needed and wanted. I gave him the ultimate girlfriend experience without the usual barriers and rules. We kissed a few times. I kissed his head while I held him. I am very affectionate. I LOVE TO LOVE.
I allowed him to do things to my body that only “real lovers” get access to. (Anal and kissing) I allowed him into my bed. He is not the best lover in the world, but we have a great emotional energy that connects between us and allows us to exchange sexual and intimate energy often without penetration because he always has coke dick.
I tried to have sex as a release with one of my new drivers (even though that is totally against my rules), which turned out to be a mistake. I ended that one as soon as possible, and even though he was not a client, the sex was too much like a job. He was out of my place as soon as he came in. I gave up on him, “You can just cum now..”I said giving him the tap on the shoulder sign. The guy had worked as a stunt cock in some porn videos recently and he seemed totally opposed to foreplay which didn’t work for me. Ironically he had a problem with the fact that I had herpes, when little to his knowlege alll porn star girls end up getting herpes because they don’t test for it in their work clearances. He was willing to eat their pussies without a dental dam but not mine? Puhlease.
I LEFT WRITING THIS POST TO MEET W/ A CLIENT..Innocent 20 year old newbie. His first time was a rip off and he was really really trying to get me to say exactly what I would do for how much. I had just gotten nearly arrested in front of a Starbucks in LA by the same newbie routine but this guy seemed to fit the characteristics of not being a cop but i was still nervous about verbalizing words of prostitution. Even as I alluded to them, I waited nervously for the back up vice squad to come rushing in, even though it was 1:30am and I knew that vice busts don’t usually happen so late at night. (they like to start them early because it takes so many hours to book a girl, typically they try to set us up at 10 or 11pm).
I was doing a lot of cuddling and massaging because he was so intent on getting a full hour of whatever it was that I was offering, so I had to extend my usual routine. Admitedly the massage part of the routine is usually only 20 minutes and the sex part is about 15 minutes, my shower is 5, closing banter is 5 and we’re both out the door in LESS THAN AN HOUR in a typical date. It’s always PAINFULLY obvious when you get the guys who need you to spend all SIXTY minutes on them because those guys are the ones with the least to contribute to the chemistry. This is why reverse escorting techniques are often needed for single girls like myself. The typical escort routine can seem a little rote and impersonal even if it is cordial and there is a genuine energy exchange.
The massage part is essential because it makes it easier for two strangers two have sex with each other without much introduction. Skin on skin and breath on back and neck are the best motivators for erection, connection, orgasm…I’ve never formally studied tantra but I believe that this is what it is for me and my client and how I practice it.
For me, it has to be that i feel enticed by the personality of the client, he has a wonderfully luxurious bed, maybe there are drugs involved which help to ease the social awkardness (or sometimes create more) OR he is hot and I would probably have fucked him for free, or there is just a distinct energy that nurtures that part of my soul that NEEDS mutual intimacy as much as he does. Not everyone sends that energy out, so it doesn’t always reach me. I am not pursuing these men like I would be in “regular” dating situations so if they decide to not provide for me, it is not a big deal usually because I was initially there to provide for them, and, to get paid to do so. Reverse escorting is still a pride game. The ball is still in my court for as long as I can hold it there. Sometimes when I proposition for a second or extended date, even if it is for FREE, they reject it. The real girlfriend experience is not part of their desire. GFE just means unprotected blowjobs and kissing to some people I guess, even though that isn’t THIS provider’s definition..I try to snatch it up in the moment where it lives. I still get paid for my time, but I give free extensions if they are willing to please me. I am extremely tickled at how my new website states “Flexibility with my rates depend on how good of a time i am having” LOL truth spoken but still vague. I love it.
The 20 year old and I did not have a genuine connection. It doesn’t work with everyone. He was ready to leave after he had an orgasm, which is what they usually want to do, which is fine fine fine with me. This left 10 minutes to spare. He didn’t want to try to come again. hey, really no sweat on my part, I said. I don’t actually include “multiple pops” in my rate, i’m just doing it because i’m trying to give you a good newbie impression really, I thought. I even got him to tip me!
I had to save up nearly $2400 ($1800 + rental fees) to rebuild my engine which recently died and I hustled like a hooker on crack for weeks to attain that goal with the help of the agency bookings and my own private clientele. When I finally reached my goal and I was ready to pick up my repaired Sasha Gray (the name of endearment for my Gray sports coupe that fuels all my girlfriend experiences ala Sasha Gray in the GFE titled movie) and return the rental, I asked my last client who was a young whoreaphobic but cute client if I could just sleep over for a few hours which I did. I convinced him to cuddle me in his arms and I knew that I was breaking all his stereotypes with every word and breath that escaped my mouth. “it’s all in your mind…”I said,”I’m just like any other girl…” He had made some sarcastic comment about “oh, the prostitute knows about safe sex?” and I responded,”why would I NOT know about safe sex? it’s my job.” I reverse escorted him for the nite but knew he wouldn’t be calling me again. His shame and stigma would prevent him from doing so. I had worked soo hard to save up so much money for the repair on top of my regular rent and expenses that I just needed someone to cuddle me until it was time to pick up my car at the MINIMUM. What I could have used was a bunch of soft kisses while saying,”I’m so proud of you baby, Congratulations. You’re such a fucking awesome hustler.” He gave me a couple of orgasms instead and his dick felt amazing inside of me so I let him have sex with me way more times than the average John..We both got our monies worth, sort of.